5775 is upon us. A new year and the 1st anniversary of Mommellah. It’s been really helpful in keeping me focused on Judaism and how it can fit practically into my life. It’s also taking me into a new realm of having a school aged child. I’m thrilled that my oldest is going to a Jewish preschool! I’m not so thrilled about all of the ways that our lives will start to change. Mostly, I want to try and keep not only my religion in focus, but motherhood as well. These High Holidays, I will reflect on how I will measure my mommellah mitzvahs and how can I keep from getting caught up in being the “perfect” mom (FYI, she doesn’t exist anyway).
Let’s start with my fears. Mostly because I’m a crazy Jewish mother and want to get them off my chest.
Kids Birthday parties every weekend. Usually multiple ones in a weekend! Can you see my eyes rolling (into the back of my head kind of way, not in a “whatever” way) from wherever you are reading this?!?! Ugh. I have a hard enough time getting my husband to agree to ANY idea I have for a weekend. He hates filling up our weekends with “busy” stuff and I don’t blame him! These parties seem to me to be just another nail in the parenting coffin. If you have any suggestions on how to set limits on how many parties you choose to attend, PLEASE share. I’m begging. Really.
The “one up” mom. Now I can appreciate mothers who take the extra time to look nice, because we all want to feel good about what we present to the world. Heck, if given the chance I love to take the time to get ready and look like the mom who has it all together. But I’m sure there will be at least one (or more) moms who will make me feel inadequate in at least one way that I never even considered would be a “thing” you could be better at than someone else. Examples include, but are not limited to: Bento Boxes, party favors and Pinterest fanatics. Really?! If you have the time to commit to these things, more power to you! I have an infant and 2 puppies and see more butts in a day than an ashtray does, so, um, yeah… I’m gonna just ignore all of the above for as long as possible.
Buying stuff we don’t need so my son can “fit in”. I know this is coming. I don’t know when or what form it will take, but I’m not excited for that day. We have a TON of hand me downs, which I am eternally grateful for and spoiled by. I do not want to buy clothes for my kids. But someday, because of school, it’s gonna happen and I’m gonna be sh*t out of luck.
So, if I’m not measuring my success as a mother with any of the above, what will I strive for this year? How can I keep myself grounded? What is important to me? I will strive for the following this year:
More cuddles. Because one day these guys won’t even want me around.
More books. Thank you PJ library!
More firsts. We recently followed up a first dentist appointment with a first pony ride. Success!
More vegetables. Boray pree ha adama! Lord, please let them eat their frickin vegetables.
More fun. Because you can be an Eeyore, or a Tigger. Be a Tigger people. Life’s too short. (Thanks Febach)
It’s so easy to get caught up in new ventures and swallowed in the rat race. These 5 benchmarks are my guide to 5775. What are yours?
May the Schwartz be with you!